Miracle Max

So, I went to the hospital to finally have my blood work done.  I was a very brave girl and went by myself to the phlebotomy lab at St. Luke’s hospital in Meridian.  I was really nervous sitting in the waiting room by myself and thinking of all of the horrible blood drawing experiences of my past.  Then a gentleman in scrubs and a white lab coat called my name. 

He took me into a little cubby with a curtain and and asked me to have a seat.  “Actually, it would really be a better idea if I lay down.”  We moved down a couple of cubbies.  I told him how horrible I was at getting my blood drawn and how I might cry, but that it had nothing to do with him.  “ Yah right,” he said, “I have been told that before.”  I told him I might get woozy or even throw up.  He came right back with, “I like a challenge.”  I couldn’t believe this guy’s confidence. “Good, because I am it.”

He checked both arms for a good vein (which was hard because even he said that I had small veins) and settled in on my right arm.  Then he said something that made me smile.  “Let’s use something really mellow.”  I liked this guy already.  “Do you want me to tell you what I’m doing, or just do it?” 

Have mercy.  “Just do it.  I don’t want to know what’s going on.”

“Let’s talk about you.  What are your hobbies?”  Wow, did I draw a blank.  I’m not really a hobby kind of person, but I liked where he was going with this.  When he asked me what I did for a living, I told him I didn’t have a job. “Good,” he said, “Jobs are overrated.”  Huh… did I really want to hear that from a guy whose job it was to stick needles into people’s arms??  I let that one go.  I told him that I graduated with a degree in Elementary education and that I was going to be a teacher, if I could ever find a job.  He said I was brave … “the little monsters.”  hehehehehe.  I liked this guy more and more.

He asked if I had kids, and I told him no.  He replied that he didn’t either.  “Good,”  I said.  It’s nice to find people with whom I have that in common.  (Somewhere in this conversation, I felt a poke, but no big deal.  I instantly put my mind off of it and back on the conversation).He told me that he couldn’t see himself with kids because he watches his nieces all the time.  He has a hard time with the singing and the pink and purple stuff everywhere.  That made me smile.  I said that I adored my nieces. 

“You’re done,” he announced as he wrapped the cotton ball with the self sticky flex tape around my arm.  It was pink and made me wonder if he really thought I was a pink kind of girl, or if that was just the color they were using that day.  I like to think that he picked it out just for me.

“Are you sure?” I asked.  “Because most of the time I hear that, people have missed the vein or something.  That was too easy.”

“Nope, I’m sure.  You’re done.  You can just get up and go, or hang out a little bit.  Which ever you are most comfortable with.”

I didn’t know what to do.  Usually I have to sit there and wait for the dizziness to pass and ask for a candy or juice or water.  I almost asked for a candy, but then I had to remind myself that I was fine and that asking would only make me look more like a five year old  (I’m 26 years old, for crying out loud!).   Meanwhile, my inner five-year-old was doing cartwheels.

I was elated!  I had just had my blood drawn and I didn’t get woozy, dizzy, lightheaded, clammy, and I didn’t cry, vomit, or pass out.  What luck!   I was feeling bold, so I told him, “I am married, but I don’t mind saying that I am in love with you right now.”

He chuckled, “Usually it’s only the little kids that tell me that.  Hearing it from you is one of the biggest compliments I’ve ever gotten.”  I felt like kissing the man.  Clearly, he did not understand the miracle he just performed. 

I can’t be certain, but I may have been skipping as I left the lab.  Heaven know I felt like it!

Bad news is…I don’t know who he is!  I can’t request him next time!  Curse my inner five-year-old for speaking to strangers and not asking for his name.  I only can hope that he will be working next time I go in (oh yes, will I be going there next time) and/or they keep record of who draws for whom at the lab. 

I hope, I hope, I hope…

Until then, he has become my Miracle Max!